[lost in life]

So I've applied to graduate school for forensic science...still waiting for the result. I really have no idea or confidence on how it is going to turn out to be. IF I do get into the program, I will be a CSI!! (Has anyone not watched it?) But I think I'm running out of patience, passion, and, most important, time and money... I expect to reach some achievements in the year of 2009, but it just doesn't seem that easy to come by. I mean I could use a bit of luck. Well, I guess God forgot to place "luck" into my DNA when he created me...Don't think I'm a big fans of biology...it would be the last thing I want to study or talk about. And the microbiology class that I'm taking is just driving me crazy. Everything is just a blur to me. If only I can I find a purpose of doing this and that, it'd be easier to me to suck it up. I mean...I don't even know what the heck I am doing. I feel like a child getting lost in a huge scary tropical forest and never gonna get out of there. Oh man, I am so disoriented now. Where is my compass??