do i believe in Him?

I mean I've got nth to lose for believing in Him. But I just think that it already takes me long enough to believe in a person, it would take me much longer to believe in someone or something that I dunno if it even exists. It doesn't just take me the length of a movie or a person's sharing time to make me believe. Those who did, I doubt if that's real. Just because you prayed and claimed that you have accepted Him, does that make you a better person already, does it make you a christian, or does it mean that He accepts you as well? People all talked about how He has helped them when they were in their worst case scenario. I would argue that they are just looking at things in a super optimistic point of view. I would not resist what He has to tell me cuz I'm so used to what they are trying to get you to do. I've been in this kind of occasion since I was in elementary school. I dunno...It's just really hard for me to believe in anything or anyone. But I am hoping to change.